Hey so life has been stressful between what's going on with my mom and my oldest sister being a witch plus my husband's dad almost died from being sick so it's just like one stress on top of the other! I feel absolutely beside myself and a lot of what my oldest sister has done to me and put me through is coming back to me and it's horrible. I feel like I don't even belong in my family more less in this world. I feel alone and depressed and like no one really cares about what I am going through. I just feel like maybe I should have never been born then people would feel better and happier. It really feels like I am bring them all down and I really can't help it. I feel completely worthless and like this world would be better without me. I really don't feel like I make a difference in this world at all. I am starting to feel like I am even wasting my time writing on here because I probably am not helping anyone and while you may be able to relate you probably feel like I am being whiny. I just wish I knew if anything I do in this life and world is making a difference. I honestly don't think it is. I also had to take a pregnancy test today since I am taking the provera and it came out negative as always so I think I am done trying I don't think I would be a good mom anyway it's to bad that I can't get myself out of this crap mindset and be a good helpful person but I keep getting told I am not more then I am told I am. I guess I have convinced myself that I am not worth anything and am a bad person who can't help anyone I can't even help myself. So I guess that's all I don't know if I will keep coming and writing I guess we will have to see. Hope your day and life is going a little better then mine and if not I hope it gets better soon thanks to those who do read and check out the Twitter for updates when I post and you can even email me now! That's all!
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June 2018
CategoriesAuthorI am Bridget I have PTSD and was recently diagnosed |